When to use it
Use it for disagreements over resources, priorities or terms where both sides need to keep working together.
How to apply it
- Separate the relationship issues from the substantive problem.
- Ask why each side wants what it is asking for, to uncover interests.
- Generate several options before deciding on any.
- Agree objective criteria for judging options, such as market rates or precedent.
- Know your best alternative if you cannot agree before you start.
Tip: Two people demanding the same thing often want it for different reasons, which opens more options.